He kissed a someone with a penis
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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