Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
