Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
