well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
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