trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Randomize
