Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Randomize
