margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
