Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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