i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
did i walk over a car last night?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
