Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
