OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Are my feet made of real feet?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
