I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
