My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
