do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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