he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize