Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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