her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
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