I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
