I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
