they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Randomize
