she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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