Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize