so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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