Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I'm always down for nudity.
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