You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize