im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
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