Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
