Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
