Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
