She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
