So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Randomize
