Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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