week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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