He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
