The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize