You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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