Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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