No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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