butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
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