whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
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