so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
