surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
