I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
My vagina just recognized that song.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize