She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
