I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
