super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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