She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
