i don't plan on having that self control this summer
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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