I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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