did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
