im holly from the hills drunk
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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