i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
